Vlog: Will Cotterall
Blog: Ryle Cho
Do you ever feel as though you have ran too far from home that there is no possible way you could be welcomed back? That maybe you start to believe you are too unworthy to try and reproach our gracious Father again? Let me tell you that He is calling out YOUR name every second of every hour of the day and He will never stop. He purses us. 1 Peter 5:10 proclaims, “And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.”
Hi! I’m Ryleigh Cho. I’m 17 years old. And I am just like you. I walk with embarrassment, with shame, with unworthiness, believing I could never run back into the arms of the Lord and be welcomed. But I am lifted up with His overwhelming grace and mercy. This past summer, July 6, 2017, I attempted to take my life. The reasons for it are for various personal reasons, but most centering around brokenness, unfaithfulness, and even feeling unloved. I was lost. I was missing something, but could never identify what it was. Why am I depressed? Why am I so nervous? Why am I like this? I started to hate who I was, who I was created as, and what I was gifted with. It all became to hard in my mind, my heart, and even my walk with Christ. I had spent an entire week in a mental facility. It was most definitely eye opening. I was so confused by why God would put me there? Why He let me go through the horror when He could save me instead? I would get so angry as to why He couldn’t make it all go away and save me right there in that moment? When I was released, I finally realized why I was put there. God does not purposely put us in situations that could harm us for His enjoyment or for Him to just sit back and watch us suffer. I believe, wholeheartedly, that God had placed me there in order to spread His good Word, His love, and His comfort to the other children in my unit. While I was in the hospital, not a day went by that I didn’t have my Bible in my hand. Every hour, I would pray a new prayer. Not just for me. For every single person in that unit, including the nurses and the community. I was able to spread as much of His love to anyone I came in contact with. Any chance I got to speak, I would speak only the truth and allowed my words to be His voice.
I was lost. For a very long time. I stopped pursuing Christ and allowed the enemy to take control of my life. But the enemy never succeeded. God continued to pursue. God continued to work through me. God continued to love me unconditionally and without any hesitation. That is how great our God is. In any situation, big or small, good or bad, God will never stop pursuing us. He will never quit on us. He will never ignore us. He will wrap us up in His arms. He will continue to say to you, “My precious daughter/son, oh how I love you.” Never once will He leave you or abandon you, and certainly never welcome you. He is calling to you. You just need to listen and come home. - Ryleigh Cho